Joining up and in

Today I joined a gym. I was a nerve wracking, stressful but great experience. I drove to this small local gym, not some big chain with gym bunnies and boof heads. Ive used this one on a short trial about 1.5 years ago and honestly it was a comfortable atmosphere. Still prior to going there I had butterflies and felt distracted... fear. I parked and sat in the car for a good few minutes convincing myself that this was for the right reasons, that it would be positive and that they wouldn't look down on me. My last line to myself was this is to save my life.

I walked in nervous, stressed on the verge of an emotional reaction. I walked up and waited, the woman at reception was cleaning her desk. I'm oddly quiet for a fat chic. Once attention was gained I blurted I want to join. She said that I was obviously here with determination and a mission. I nodded on the verge of tears, she smiled and said that I was here to do something and that I would. I don't know why and there was the air of being pathetic, however I started to cry, only tears no crazy sobbing.

We sat and I filled out the paperwork, blurting out personal useless information. She was great, honest, positive without making it feel fake. Forms filled out, money paid, boring stuff past. We discussed who would be my personal trainer (from now known as the PT). The girl jointly chosen, has been where I have and beyond, she understand and is very good at what she does. So I'm feeling very positive about the PT.

By the way at this stage I am no longer filling with tears.

Next is the first work out. Basically I learnt about the Machines. First I did 15 mins on the treadmill, I don't mind it as I can zone out and just think and breathe. Then 11 mins on the cross trainer. OK I officially love this machine, its like dancing I honestly could have kept going except for the jelly legs. Then onto the bike for 10 mins. OK so i really don't like bikes, feet get pins and needles, bum goes numb and my already painful tailbone plays havoc. I will find my way through on this, I know I will.

I have to say that no matter how uncomfortable and fearful I was this was a brilliant experience.

I'm now writing a food diary and I have my first PT session tomorrow. Wish me luck.